my son just got back his exam results today. i was pretty estatic that he got all above 90%, and of course a few very very careless mistakes in his English and Maths papers (which had clearly jeorpadize his chances of getting full marks). i am a bit dissapointed that the few things that i had tirelessly taught him in Maths, he somehow had forgotten about it and did the same silly mistakes he had done before. of course he got a scolding for that. his Mandarin was ok although i seriously am worried about next year when he goes for his primary one chinese school. i do not speak or write or read Mandarin. it is gonna be a tough time for all of us.
well that is not the issue here. i have been brought up to do the very best that i can in my exams, although very minimal supervision from my parents, i get my push from my peers who had done better than me. i wanted to get that murid contoh back in primary school but i did not, so instead i fought for my dean's lists and tokoh kepimpinan in college. i did not managed to go into the best class in high school, but i was top 3 in college. i did not get any rotan or scolding when i did badly in school, but i managed to get grade 1 for spm and have an accounting degree. so would now be any different for my boy?
apparently some parents have gone way overboard on their children (that is what i feel la). if their child do not get top 10, one rotan. if one careless mistake, one knock on the head. every exams must get top 3, if not that is the end of their social life. these parents have boys, so far i have not heard what do they do with girls. so should i do the same? push my boy till his limit and stop when he is showing signs of breaking down?
gosh, my failure of not maintaining that competitiveness in my son is further enhanced because i am after all a stay at home mom (SAHM). so just because i am a SAHM, my children are supposed to be well-trained and obedient and disciplined and score 100% in their exams. they must always have a happy face when greeting elder people, act orderly when strangers are around, entertain uncles and aunties, learn a foreign language every year, play all sports, play the piano, pick up a new soft skill every month.. urrgghh the list goes on.
my child is not spoilt. he does not grumble when it is time for him to grumble (so to speak). he picked up the keyboard all by himself. he learned Tamil in 2 weeks. he is a happy camper. he scored in his exams. he is a good athlete. he mixes so well with other children. SO what else am i lacking here?
should i enrol him in a proper piano class? enrol him in a science camp? teach him multiplication and division so that he will be better than his elder cousins? teach him Hakka, Cantonese, Hindi etc? register him up for essay writing in Mandarin, BM and English? football academy perhaps? make sure he bows and shake hands with all his relatives before he can play with his friends? keep a rotan in my purse just in case?
the more i complain, the more i feel that i should have done more, i guess. should have had a more scheduled time table for him to study. less play time especially the last 2 months before his exam. i was also blinded by the fact that some of his friends do not take their studies seriously, as they did not do well in their weekly spelling tests. i made it a point for angelus to get full marks for his English, BM and Mandarin spelling tests. but when i see that there are some mothers who do not bother at all, i somehow felt like i should take it slow as well.
sigh... a lot to be done before the school term starts on 4th January 2009. a lot of changes for angelus, myself and hubby. i have got to get it in top form before the baby comes as well. i just hope and pray for a clear head and a less stressful year ahead.
well that is not the issue here. i have been brought up to do the very best that i can in my exams, although very minimal supervision from my parents, i get my push from my peers who had done better than me. i wanted to get that murid contoh back in primary school but i did not, so instead i fought for my dean's lists and tokoh kepimpinan in college. i did not managed to go into the best class in high school, but i was top 3 in college. i did not get any rotan or scolding when i did badly in school, but i managed to get grade 1 for spm and have an accounting degree. so would now be any different for my boy?
apparently some parents have gone way overboard on their children (that is what i feel la). if their child do not get top 10, one rotan. if one careless mistake, one knock on the head. every exams must get top 3, if not that is the end of their social life. these parents have boys, so far i have not heard what do they do with girls. so should i do the same? push my boy till his limit and stop when he is showing signs of breaking down?
gosh, my failure of not maintaining that competitiveness in my son is further enhanced because i am after all a stay at home mom (SAHM). so just because i am a SAHM, my children are supposed to be well-trained and obedient and disciplined and score 100% in their exams. they must always have a happy face when greeting elder people, act orderly when strangers are around, entertain uncles and aunties, learn a foreign language every year, play all sports, play the piano, pick up a new soft skill every month.. urrgghh the list goes on.
my child is not spoilt. he does not grumble when it is time for him to grumble (so to speak). he picked up the keyboard all by himself. he learned Tamil in 2 weeks. he is a happy camper. he scored in his exams. he is a good athlete. he mixes so well with other children. SO what else am i lacking here?
should i enrol him in a proper piano class? enrol him in a science camp? teach him multiplication and division so that he will be better than his elder cousins? teach him Hakka, Cantonese, Hindi etc? register him up for essay writing in Mandarin, BM and English? football academy perhaps? make sure he bows and shake hands with all his relatives before he can play with his friends? keep a rotan in my purse just in case?
the more i complain, the more i feel that i should have done more, i guess. should have had a more scheduled time table for him to study. less play time especially the last 2 months before his exam. i was also blinded by the fact that some of his friends do not take their studies seriously, as they did not do well in their weekly spelling tests. i made it a point for angelus to get full marks for his English, BM and Mandarin spelling tests. but when i see that there are some mothers who do not bother at all, i somehow felt like i should take it slow as well.
sigh... a lot to be done before the school term starts on 4th January 2009. a lot of changes for angelus, myself and hubby. i have got to get it in top form before the baby comes as well. i just hope and pray for a clear head and a less stressful year ahead.
Angelus is a smart boy, Competition out there on education is pretty high and this smart boy has done d best he could, except d careless mistakes..
Come on cheer him up and encourage him to perform better on his upcoming exams. Scolding him and keeping rotan ( macam guru discipline sahaja ) on d purse is going to make him feel bad and could lead to some kinda trauma and stain on his childhood life memory when he grow up big, although as from parents point of view – of course we are doing it for d good of our children’s future.
“happy children can perform better compare to d one gets scold or on 100% tight supervision even d controlled one”
This is just a Tadika lah , just a beginning .. Knowing Angelus, this smart boy will b d best student on his studies and great sports man as well in his future. Last but not least .. should thank d parents as well who has so much love and care towards their children compare to those who did not. I would say Angelus has got great parents, and I believe he will be one d best for all in all with his parents LOVE & TUNJUK AJAR. Well Done Angelus, I know u can perform better so try harder for better results in future and make your parents proud… oops looks like I have wrote a short essay under comments .. sowwy ..
SELVA
I would be very proud of my boy for all the things that your son has achieved!! Please dont go overboard with the expectations like some parents do...after all they are still kids and let them have some child life too :) I think you have done tremendously with him. So do without more pushing ;p
Hohoho! Merry Christmas!
Congrats to your son! :) 90% ++ all? That's extremely good!
And the whole rotan thing... haiyoh. So kesian lah the kids. Nanti trauma pula...
hi everyone.. thanks to all for ur comments. a little bit of pushing is healthy i guess. i just make sure that he likes the things that we are pushing him to do. i have not used the rotan on him for a long time now. mostly he gets heart to heart talk from me at least, and a little bit of scolding here and there from jerry. other than that, there is of course still room for improvement. Go angelus!!